I’m laying in bed, Graham is watching TV. I’m dozing in and out of sleep. It’s a rare day for an afternoon nap, and I needed it. Napping is a luxury in my house. Well, for me at least.
I think every mom deserves to take naps. I just don’t get to do it often. And, if I were to do it, I wouldn’t want my husband to “catch” me in a nap. Not, that he would judge me (right, hon?), but I want him to understand how insane my days are, and catching me mid-snooze fest in the afternoon kinda destroys that illusion.
“What’s this?” my husband asks after coming home early (so I could go on a run). “Huh?” I ask somewhat confused. Holy heck, it’s 5:20 pm. I crawled into bed at 4pm to take a 5 min. power-nap. Oops.
“Um, today totally kicked my A-S-S,” I reply, spelling out the A-S-S so that the three-and-a-half-year-old in the room won’t understand. Except….
“A-S-S, A-S-S, A-S-S, A-S-S!” Graham responds excitedly. Oh S-H-I-T. I’ve messed up. Jon and I look at each other and freeze. “Don’t react,” we both silently communicate to each other.
“Hey, Graham? Tell me about the TV show you’re watching.” I casually try to distract him, but he runs into the other room. When he returns he’s carrying a Leap Frog alphabet computer with him. The game happens to have an option where you type in three letters to try and make a word. Uh oh,I think. I know exactly where this is going.
“A-S…” Graham begins to type in the letters so he can hear the word I was spelling out. Seriously? Well, thank goodness Leap Frog had the foresight to keep three-year-old’s from spelling out dirty words. “A-S-Enter three letters to spell a word,” the computer urges.
He tries a few more times, then I tell Jon, “You know what? This day totally kicked my B-A-T.” Graham enters B-A-T into the computer. “BAT,” the machine replies.
Lesson learned: Graham now knows how to spell A-S-S and B-A-T. I now know I can no longer spell out words I don’t want my kids to repeat.
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