The Letter You Never Want to Get

I received a letter in the mail from the church that I attend on a not-so regular basis. This is how it starts:

“Dear Parents:
Congratulations! As a parent of a child of nursery age, you have been selected to volunteer in our Nursery during the Fall schedule of 2011! [yada,yada, yada] I’ve attached a list of Sundays for September – January with the names, numbers, and emails of the parents assisting in the Nursery.”

I frantically refer to the aforementioned list. Yep, there it is. Staring right back at me… “Jonathan and Katie Harding – September 25, 2011.” Really?

I feel like I just got summoned for jury duty. And it’s not exactly like you can call the court house and say, “I didn’t vote in the last election. In fact, I was late on my tax bill. And may have committed a few crimes in my lifetime. Are you sure you want me?”

Because, I’m seriously thinking about calling that Nursery Director to say something to the effect of, “Don’t you know I only go to church on Christmas, Easter, and an occasional Mother’s Day? In fact, I don’t always say my prayers before I eat. And may not have the best anger management skills. Are you sure you want me?”

I guess my dismay at this so-called duty makes me ungracious, right? And selfish, and just pretty darn grumpy. But just two questions people…. Isn’t Sunday the day of rest? And since when do you give a family of four three days notice via snail mail that you have to give up an entire weekend morning to babysit? Hello, email???

So, yes, I’ll be sending a request to swap dates with some other poor sap. Or I’ll just show up and be a good citizen of humanity. But I’m gonna be bitter about it. Just so ya know.

Bah humbug.

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