Graham rarely naps during nap-time. It’s evolved into quiet time. Which basically means, I give him any toy he desires and will offer any bribe so that I may get a few hours of work and/or relaxation in. Sometimes Graham just hangs out in his room and plays. Other times, he ventures out of his room every five minutes with more and more extravagant needs and excuses for why nap time must end now.
This is how it went down today, starting at 2:30.
Me: Graham, it’s nap time. Let’s read a story and then you need to stay in your room until the clock says 4-3-0.
Graham: Okay. But, can I have my Innotab (a.k.a. kiddie iPad)?
Me: Uh, yeah, I guess.
(Sidenote: I usually leave this as a last resort if he comes out at 4-0-0 asking for another toy, but today I am desperate to fold Mt. Laundry that is threatening to erupt in our living room.)
This worked for about one hour. One short hour of bliss. 3:30 rolls around, and Graham-man is desperate to end nap time.
Graham: Mom! There’s an alligator in my room.
Me: Tell the alligator mommy says hi and to be quiet. It’s nap time.
He saunters back to his room. Minutes later…
Graham: Mom! Now, there’s a dinosaur in my room!
Me: Interesting! Maybe you should ask the dinosaur to eat the alligator. Sounds like your room is getting crowded.
Thinking this is a great idea, he returns to his room. But, I quickly hear the pitter-patter of tiny feet running towards me…
Graham: Mommy!!!! There’s now a lizard in my room!
Me: Well, then hurry back and tell that dinosaur not to eat the alligator, because the alligator will probably eat that lizard for you.
Graham runs back to the room to ensure that the dinosaur does not eat the alligator. But, sadly, mere moments later…
Graham: Mom! Now, there’s a hippopotamus and an elephant in my room.
Me: Graham, go back to your room. You clearly have a bona fide zoo going on in there. Tell the animals to behave. Also, you should probably start charging admission to your room. Many of those taking up residence in there are quite exotic. And, if you come back out again – I’m taking away your Innotab!
Graham returned to his room. At 4:45 (fifteen minutes after his nap was to be over), I go to tell Graham he can get up now.
Graham: Mom, you need to give me five miles.
Me: What?
Apparently, that’s the cost to go to his zoo. Smart kid. I should probably start teaching him about currency though, huh?
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