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I need help, y’all. If you know how to get picky eaters to eat, let me know!
I always have good intentions. Don’t we all? Every dinner starts out with some sort of protein or pasta, a veggie and a fruit. And, of course a tall glass o’ milk.
Things usually start off well. Both kids dig into their favorite parts of the meal; my oldest starts with veggies, my youngest with anything white or brown. After the favorites are complete, the pleading begins. “Eat your dinner. I’ve got a great treat for you if you finish your plate!” Then it goes downhill from there, “If you don’t take a bite – Time OUT! Don’t throw your fork at your brother. I mean it, bedtime if you don’t eat a cucumber right now!”
You get the idea. And, then this happens:
Yeah, tears. And crying.
It’s not a good time to be a three-year-old or a parent at our house these days. The battles at meal-time are getting intense. I’m going to win, of course. Sometimes “winning” means that a bite gets taken, sometimes winning could be a finished plate. Sometimes winning means he didn’t intentionally throw up his food out of spite. We take our wins where we can get them.
Yeah, I’m winning the battles (if you count that winning), but it’s going to be a long war. Good thing I have a few allies. My blender (where I puree veggies to hide them when desperate), carrots (for some reason their orange-ness tends not to offend my children), and L’il Critters Vitamins.
Despite my best efforts, I know that at the end of the day, my kids are getting the essential nutrients they need when I give them L’il Critters Vitamins. The tasty and innocuous chewy bears are welcomed by my kids, and needless to say, I don’t mention to them that they are “good for them.” God forbid. It’s just part of our morning routine, when I take my own prenatal vitamins. Everyone gets their days off to a great start. Which is good…
‘Cause y’all know what I’m dealing with come dinner time.
What are your tips (besides threatening time-out) for getting picky eaters to eat their dinners?
I have a 14 yo boy and 12 yo girl. I wish I would have made more of an effort to have the kids eat a better variety of food when they were younger. Yours are still very young, so you still have time! 🙂 My advice is to not make it a battle. Kids really only have control over two things in their life when they are that small. What they will eat and if they choose to go to the bathroom (potty training anyone??). The only thing they feel they have control over is their own body and are usually hesitant to have someone else “control” for lack of a better word-their body. Offer the foods you would like to serve for that meal. You have a rule: a “no thank-you” bite. If the kids want to eat all of the things they like on the plate and are left with something that is new or that they don’t like, they have to take one “no-thank you” bite. If they decide they don’t like it and don’t want to eat it, fine-they can say no thank you-I don’t like it and the meal is over. No seconds of the foods they already ate on the plate that they liked. If they are still hungry, tell them they they can eat at the next meal. If you usually have a snack between meals, have the snack but keep it a”regular” sized or small snack-it’s not a meal- your child will try to eat a whole bag of crackers because they didn’t eat all of the food you served at the last meal! Serve your next meal and see how it goes! I wouldn’t serve 3 meals in a day that had all new foods, but you your best judgement. I really think half of the battle is the unknown of the new food. (texture, taste-etc) after quite a few “no thank you ” bites kids start to get used to things and it is usually not so bad. Keep in mind this will take a long time! Imagine if someone was making us try something new all the time! It would be exhausting!! Keep trying, it will pay off in the long run. My kids have a pretty wide variety of food that they will eat, but I wished I would have kept going with it longer, so they would eat everything!!!! Good luck!
Such great advice! Thanks!
We talk about where the food came from! a garden, a cow, a pig. For whatever reason, that gets my kiddo interested in trying something he didn’t want to eat…
That works for my big kid. Can’t wait ’til my three year old is ready for some old fashion “rationalization!”
I am lucky that my girls are great eaters. We’ll see about my son though. I make sure that if I add some new food, then the rest of the meal are things that my girls like. I don’t make them finish their plate, but I will ask them to eat __ number of bites depending on what the food is or how much of the rest of their meal they have eaten. They get to practice counting while they take the bites which sometimes takes their mind off of the task. If they refuse to eat, then dinner is done and they go to bed. Dessert or a treat after the meal is rare for us, so they know they can’t hold out for something better.
I like it! Thanks!
A friend of mine does the “no thank you” bite, but what happens when the kid will not take that bite? I tried this, to no avail. We cannot force them to take a bite, as you said. My 4 yo is the king of REALLY taking control over things that only he can decide to do (e.g., potty training, sleeping, eating, you name it). I’m at my wit’s end over here because he only eats a few things and that includes only ONE fruit (banana) and only if it has peanut butter on it. I’m currently looking for a person in Charlotte to help us because I feel like I’ve read so much advice out there and most of it doesn’t speak to our challenges in this area. If you know of anyone, please share!
I will report on a victory though. Tonight I had had it. I knew he hadn’t eaten much during the 2nd half of the day and was hungry. He started foraging in the pantry. I told him he couldn’t eat a snack and that I’d make him dinner. I put a bite of a bunch of stuff that his Dad and I would eat for dinner later in a mini muffin pan. I told him that this is the only stuff that would be served. (We say this a lot and we even hold the line on it. Many nights he does not eat dinner) Over the next few hours, he did eat a bunch of pecans and 2 “servings” of pear. Because of this, he was able to have what he wanted, which was a yogurt stick. Baby steps, right?
Nikki-You are right, trying to have a rational “no thank you” bite with a 4 yo is almost impossible! I think if you do it anyway, eventually as he gets older it will work. You might want to consider moving the pantry to an area higher up where he doesn’t have access to any of the food in there. That might be one less battle you would have to fight with him! A good habit to get into is that snacks are also something that an adult takes care of until a reasonable age. Adults typically make most meals in most households, so let the young ones know that picking out anything they want at any time isn’t an option! 🙂 Sometimes kids have trouble with textures. My very good friend works as a sensory therapist for kids, maybe looking into someone like that would help you on the path of exploring new foods. Kids will do amazing things for people that are not their parents!! Good Luck!